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Finding Their Manners
By: Heather Baer
Sitting In his chair with near-perfect posture, he carefully picks up the basket of bread and offers a roll to those seated on either side of him before taking one for himself. He then breaks off a small piece of bread and carefully butters it.Trying to spark some conversation, he announces to the table, "I can't wait for the ice cream."
For second-grader Drew Von Bergen his after-school social grace and etiquette class is more than just a class about manners-- it's a chance to have some snacks.
"My favorite part of the class is the ice cream and waffles," Drew said. "We pretend the waffles are steak and cut them with a knife and fork."
Drew, 8 is one of several children enrolled in an etiquette class offered by the Manhattan Beach Parks and Recreation Department. Maggie O'Farrill instructor of the etiquette course, said this class teaches children the importance of manners.
"Children need to know why there are rules, not just that the rules need to be obeyed," O'Farrill said. "In this class they learn that etiquette is there for safety reasons."
O'Farrill teaches the children how to speak on the telephone, introduce themselves, eat at a dinner table and carry on a conversation.
"I tell the kids that first impressions are very important and that they must know what to do when they meet people," O'Farrill said. "When they know what to do they are more confident, they don't shy away from people."
Von Bergen said he is excited to put his newfound manners into practice. "I'm happy because now I don't have to worry about messing up when I meet people," he said. "I know that when I meet somebody I should shake their hand, look into their eyes and try my best to remember their name."
Idris Al-Oboudi, recreation services manager for the Manhattan Beach Parks and Recreation Department, said the success of the class is due to O'Farrill's teaching methods.
" She makes it fun for the kids and that helps them to learn the rules of etiquette," Al-Oboudi said. "She plays games with them, but every game that is played is a lesson in etiquette."
One of O'Farrill's favorite games is a lesson on how to have a conversation.
She rolls a small ball toward one of the children, says the child's name and asks the child a question. The child answers the question, then fields similar questions from the other children. The rules are that the person asking the question must address the person by their name and make eye contact with them.
"People love to talk about themselves, so in order to start a good conversation and be polite it is important to ask people questions," O'Farrill says.
Molly Zuckerman, 8 said the only part of the class she didn't like was learning how to "walk like a lady."
"We learned lots of other things about manners and how to eat but I don't know why we had to practice the walking," Zuckerman said. "We already know how to walk."
At the end of the class the children are invited to a dinner to practice their new manners.
Pictured below: One of Maggie's Students, Maggie O'Farrill, Idris Al-Oboudi
"The parents are always so pleased to see how well their children behave, how well they carry on a conversation and how well they eat at a dinner table," O'Farrill said.
Richard Propster and his wife Mery registered their grandchildren Christopher, 11 and Madeleine, 7 for O'Farrill's class and were impressed with the results.
"They knew which utensils to use and, if grandpa made a fauxpas, Madeleine told me what was the correct thing to do," Propster said. "Since the kids have taken this class we have been able to take them to upscale restaurants."
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